“Give it away, give it away, give it away now…”

by Katie Pizzuto on September 23, 2010

in TV Shows,Wine

It’s been a really long time since I had something to give away to you guys, but this one should prove to be a lot of fun. I don’t know if any of you have ever heard of the British TV series Black Books, but the main character is the owner of a small bookshop who also happens to be a complete lush. If you haven’t heard of it, don’t worry…this giveaway has nothing to do with that show. But it’s great and you need to hunt it down on DVD or on YouTube at the very least. Anyhow, this Gonzo giveaway is related to another show with a lush: HBO’s Bored to Death, a series based in Brooklyn, about a writer named Jonathan who’s recovering from a painful break-up (thanks in part to his drinking), can’t write his second novel, and decides that rather than face reality, he’s going to jump into his fantasies and moonlight as a private detective—an unlicensed one.

In honor of its second season premiere (September 26th at 10pm), HBO decided to create a Bored to Death private label chardonnay, in partnership with New York’s City Winery. And because this blog is so damned cool, thus by default its readers being so damned cool, Gonzo Gastronomy is slated to receive not one but two samples of the wine to review. So here’s what I’m thinking…given that I’m not one to do traditional reviews here, I figured it might be fun to have one of you guys taste it as well, and then we’ll both write up our thoughts. Emails, drafts, buzz-scribbled tasting notes…a fucking blast, I tell ya. But I don’t share my podium very willingly, so let’s get to how you actually go about winning this puppy.

I want to know two things: If you had to spend the rest of your life drinking only 1 thing and watching only 1 TV show, what would they be? If it’s a wine, beer, spirit, etc. I want to know what kind…that’s enough unless you feel like giving me a brand, too. So “pinot noir” is cool, but so is “Domaine de la Romanée Conti.” At 10pm the night of the premiere (this Sunday) I’ll pick a winner from all those who comment, and get a bottle high-tailed over to you. Unlike most other bloggers who pick a winner randomly from the comments in an effort to be objective and democratic, I’m picking my favorite answer because objectivity has no business sticking its nose into wine, and this blog is an autocracy. After that I’ll be in touch, and we’ll suck this puppy down in the comfort of our own homes and come together with some rants and raves.

So here’s a chance to get on the soapbox, kiddies. I know you’ve always had the opportunity to state your opinions in the comments section, but now’s your chance to throw your weight around just a bit more—it’s a lot of weight, I know. And for the love of Bacchus, make sure it’s not about hints of pineapple and overwhelming oak, OK? Whoever gets a crack at this needs to get their gonzo panties on and leave the snooze-fest tasting notes to the cemetery club.

UPDATE: So here’s the deal. I nearly chose Anne because it’s not often you see a woman pick bourbon, and that wins points in my book (not to mention that she actually listened to me and went to go look up Black Books). I almost chose Don because he went off into a daydream, very much Gonzo-style. I almost chose Raul, not only because he called me darling, but because he chose Jacques Cousteau…a very cool, off-the-wall choice. I nearly went with Zinhead because his indecision was hilarious…I’d put Pintofstout in this category, too…listening to his stream of consciousness was entertaining. Andrew’s response was pretty cool as well, in both the drink and TV show department. The one that came “this close” to winning was CindyW, not so much because of her answers, but because she was the only one that managed to figure out that if you guys were shackled to one drink and one TV show the rest of your lives, you would, in essence, be “bored to death.” So congrats for making the connection, Cindy, but no cigar for you.

At the end of the day, the one that truly went at this challenge Gonzo style was Lou, aka Coupe 60. The witty diatribe about Austria’s Klammer and Limt was a roaring start, the snarky comments directed at Coors Brewing Company were right up my alley, the blatant ass kissing was a bonus (particularly because it followed an insult), and despite the fact that there were no multiple entries allowed, his attempt to enter as “Carmine from Vivi” (a restaurant I reviewed not long ago) was balls-of-steel worthy. Thanks for joining the mayhem guys…it was a blast. If this works out as well as I think it will, you can all look forward to a monthly sample giveaway/guest writing opportunity. Now bugger off and go lick your wounds!

{ 27 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Anne September 23, 2010

Show: Mad Men
Drink: I’d be tempted to drink some bourbon, but if it was a drink for the rest of my life, I’d have to say Cab Franc from the Loire.

Now I need to go look up Black Books!


2 Rosemary September 23, 2010

I would have to say Cabernet Sauvignon and Knots Landing.


3 Constance C September 23, 2010

I know you’re going to think this is a marketing ploy… but I promise you it’s not (perhaps I’ve just been brainwashed) I honestly could drink Gruener Veltliner for the rest of my life… the brand is a bit tougher, but I think I might be persuaded to pick something from the Kremstal at least… narrows it down a little….


4 Constance September 23, 2010

I forgot the TV show.. Desperate Housewives 🙂


5 Don September 23, 2010

Wel Katie, I’m sure you know my drink…Bourbon, of course. If I had to narrow it down a bit I guess I’d say Old Weller Antique. 107 proof, and aged in oak 7 years it is a sweet and spicy sensation that I guess I could live on. I’m assuming I’d still get water, because I’d be dead pretty soon if I didn’t.

TV show is tougher. See Jim and I have been raised on decades of trash TV. Sitcoms, cop shows, and anything with partial nudity(network of course). But if I had to pick just one show, I think I would have to go with Hell’s Kitchen. I just love Gordon Ramsey’s potty mouth and I don’t care who knows it. If I were stranded on a desert island I would hope it was with a bazillion cases of Old Weller Antique and Gordon Ramsey so he could look over at me every 2 minutes and just say “Fuck You! Bloody Hell”


6 Raul Rovira September 23, 2010

Too easy my darling Katie…

My Drink:
“Nica Mothers Milk”
Take one high ball glass, fill with store bought cube ice, (none of this half moon home fridge crap), fill said glass liberaly (about 40% full) of Flor de Caña Gran Reserva (thats the 7 year old), fill almost to the tippy top with Perrier, give it a splash of coca-cola (just for color really) and squeeze a lime wedge into it, drop lime in, give it a whirl and enjoy…one of life simple pleasures, the perfect rum drink

My Show….
The Jacques Cousteau Oddyssey – The classic 1978 series of world exploration and subaquatic conquest! C’est bon!


7 Katie Pizzuto September 24, 2010

Love the variation here! Keep ’em coming guys!!


8 Zinhead September 24, 2010

Well, what else? Red Zinfandel for all eternity. Turley would fit the bill but if St. Peters out of it I’d be happy with Dashe. No wait. I’d be happier with Ridge but St. Peter may make the mark up on the Ridge outta my price range so I’d have to go with Elyse. Ok thats it Elyse. Hmmmmm. One TV show. Easy. Columbo.


9 Julius September 24, 2010

The wine: “A special occasion – Chateau Picard 2267.”

The show: “Star Trek: The Next Generation”


10 Pintofstout September 24, 2010

I have varying drinking moods that span the spectrum from whiskey to wine and the whole range of beers depending on the weather or my stress level. But the underlying constant, regardless of circumstance or mood, would be stout. Guinness would be an easy answer, though there are better. I would say I’d be elated with any cask stout, since I’ve only been lucky enough to have one, but it left an indelible mark. So, I would spend the remainder of my lifetime drinking nothing but Rogue’s Shakespeare Stout from a cast (water be damned).

If we drank nothing but alcohol for the rest of our lives, would it really matter what television show was on? Fine, I’ll pick a show. Unlike my beverage of choice, I can’t say I’d not tire of anything on television after repeated watching, but I do enjoy me some adult cartoons with my adult beverages. Not those kinds of cartoons, you perverts, I’m talking about shows like Family Guy, The Simpsons, The Venture Brothers, etc.; not your Saturday morning kids’ fare. I’d almost choose The Tick for its superhero self-awareness feel and the sheer enthusiasm of the main character, but the show had a limited run and the material would get old. Besides, that would be for the me of my late teens. Instead, I’d choose Futurama. Matt Groenig is a masterful satirist and I could probably relate with the alcohol-swilling robot Bender.


11 CindyW September 24, 2010

I also pondered The Tick and The Venture Brothers, but I’ve already seen all of the episodes multiple times…not sure I could watch them forever without losing the wonder of it all. At least Venture Bros. has new episodes still airing.

Now there is a loud voice in my head going back and forth between “Spoon!” and “Ignore Me!” 🙂


12 linsey September 24, 2010

Drink – the perfect smoothie – raspberries, norfolk strawberries, orange juice, mangoes, red and blackcurrants and lots of ice for a great smoothie headache!

Show – Top Gear – british tv car show with Clarkson, May and Hammond …. kick arse and bloody funny …


13 linsey September 24, 2010

just to add one of my fav top gear clips – they bought cars in Florida and drove to New Orleans (where they gave the cars to people who had lost everything in the hurricane) but this is a clip of what they did in Alabama – loved it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fuw81WAHbfM


14 CindyW September 24, 2010

It is difficult to pick something that might provide a bit of variation from night to night, so I wouldn’t end up bored to death. Oh, wait, maybe that’s the hidden goal of this challenge? In that case, my beverage choice would be Sebastiani merlot, paired with any Law & Order. Comfortable, predictable, nothing challenging, but enough there to keep me mildly amused before nodding off to sleep.

No? Not really the question? Okay, here’s my real answer:

This year, my favorite wines all have mourvedre in them, so my beverage selection is mourvedre focused wine, whether its an Italian monastrell blend or Washington state single vineyard. To match up with the quirky wine choice, I would pick any of a number of the quirky shows I’ve loved. . . the problem is they all get canceled after a season or two (I’m looking at you, Better Off Ted), which would get repetitive quickly. Instead, I’m going with the long-running Masterpiece Mystery! on PBS.


15 Coupe 60 September 24, 2010

I’m forwarding this post to the Red Mountain police as a possible lead in the Grand Reve Mourvedre Robbery…


16 Katie Pizzuto September 24, 2010

Give him a chance to win some free wine and a pulpit and THIS is what he does.


17 Coupe 60 September 24, 2010

Impatient Biatch…see below…


18 CindyW September 24, 2010

LOLing, good one Coupe!

I was especially bummed about the robbery because the winemaker for their new release was going to be James Mantone of Syncline, who makes one of my favorite ever mourvedres. 🙁


19 Coupe 60 September 24, 2010

That is really a strange story Cindy…I really feel for those guys…I mean they lost like 98% of their Mourvedre grapes..Only a 100 pounds left out of over a tone…that is just unbelievable.


20 Coupe 60 September 24, 2010

Well the TV show is very easy, that would have to be the “Gustav Klimt Comedy Central Roast” hosted by Lisa Lampenelli (Jeffrey Ross’s bit is not to be missed). It appeared only once on the ABC (Austrian Broadcasting Company), and was possibly only topped in the annals of comedy by the Comedy roast of far more well known Austrian, Franz Klammer, on the same network which was unfortunately destroyed by a tragic fire at the network after airing only once and thus not available as an answer to this contest. As for my one and only drink, believe it or not, I am going with Water…Crisp clear refreshing and needed for life…H2O…I love wine as much as the next guy, but probably could not drink it with every meal for every day for the rest of my life. Water goes with Breakfast, Lunch and dinner….and even with wine…I even enjoy the water that comes from the Coors brewing company and is sold in the silver cans with the mountains that turn blue when it is cold enough to drink….

As a late aside, I have been informed that perhaps I should pick a less quirky and better known TV show (though any idiot that doesn’t know whom Gustav Klimt is should be greatly ashamed at themselves – as scores of internet polls have revealed him to be extremely well known by foodies at least). With that in mind, I am going with Seinfeld…That show truly is timeless, I can’t believe its last original episode aired over 12 years ago. The jokes still make me laugh out loud, and I still use such classics as “Not that there is anything wrong with that”, “Take the pen Jerry”, and “Vandalay Industries” in my everyday conversations…

As an unrelated aside, I’m not sure its mentioned enough about what a truly great blog this is Katie. In fact, it is one of the truly great literary pieces in any medium that exists today. Its quality is probably only matched by your beauty,intelligence, and great sense of humor.

Finally, I’d also like some information on how I can pre-order your upcoming book in large quantities as I need the security of knowing that it won’t be sold out.


21 Katie Pizzuto September 24, 2010

Way to kiss ass, Lou….though given you just called me an impatient biatch, I think the two kinda wash each other out 🙂


22 Carmine from Vivi September 24, 2010

Hey Pretty lady, How you doing? How come you no visit my fantastic restaurant anymore? I’m entering this contest so we could you know, share a little vino…

for my TV show, there can only be one choice…”Jersey Shore”….ohhh that Snooki, what I wouldn’t do to her, she is truly DTF…and as a 100% Italian stallion myself, I got a spot in my heart for DJ Pauly D, aond Mike “the Situation”, I only hope my boys when they grow up are as dedicated to the GTL lifestyle as those fine role models.

The beverage is a little harder, capece…but I gotta say it has to be one of the fine bottles of Chianti that we sell at Vivi…Something with straw on the bottle, to really show it quality… Ciao Bella, and why don’t you and your fine looking lady friends come in for another visit…


23 David from Seattle September 24, 2010

Resigned to one drink for my remaining days on earth a tortured soul I would be. Choosing this drink would be like getting the choice of a cell in which to spend your life sentence but certainly better than not having that choice. I would look to wine from Southern Rhone. Boredom would certainly ensue but there is ample variety in fruit, style and expression to knock the edge off of the tediousness.

As for the TV show it would be The Office. I chose this for two simple reasons; it is currently the show that consistently gets a chuckle out of me and of course it is a perfect pairing with the wine. Like Chateauneuf, which can blend up to 13 different grape varietals, the show works because of the variety of characters that interact with each other. It’s a whimsical show for sure as is wine from S. Rhone as compared to say a contemplative Burgundy or serious and polished Bordeaux. Finally the show is made up of pedestrian characters and even filmed in a voyeuristic manner. Rhone wines are some of the most pedestrian in the world and the best ones transport you back to that Chateau, which is a glorified garage, where you barrel sample the finest elixir with the farmer who crafts this godly nectar.


24 Andrew September 25, 2010

Drink: Guinness Foreign Extra Stout because it’s always interesting and I can drink it like a white; chilled, a red; room temperature, or a ‘cocktail’; over ice. But maybe that’s just me!

TV Show: BBC Horizons because it’s also always interesting and goes well with a Foreign Extra.


25 Subdaimon September 25, 2010

This is easy, Vanilla Shakes and South Park


26 Wirelesswine September 26, 2010

For me, it has to be Dexter….and what better beverage to match than a thick, viscous red like Larkmead reserve cabernet?


27 Katie Pizzuto September 27, 2010

OK, folks, a winner has been chosen. Read the update up top in the post to find out who gets the juice. Thanks for playing!


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